Dr. Seuss once said, “You never know the value of a moment until it becomes a memory.” What stunning and poignant words. I’m trying desperately to catch each one, and hold on to it just long enough for an imprint to stay behind. To grasp all of the beautiful and wretched like my favorite old polaroids which always remain in my head, and never fade with the passing of time. There’s been so much life swirling inside this living of mine, and all I’ve been begging of myself is to write it down and remember. For too long. So here goes!
Some long sentiments, some short. Some light, some dark. Some weightless as a feather and some heavy as a wrecking ball. But I’d like to preserve it all in this form. And look back on it when I need to, when I want to. To show my babies. And tell a few stories. I hope you will find a little something here to stir up your head and heart, with a splash of solace and a dollop of joy on the side...
Thank you for being here!
motherhood
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Turkeys by the tree @whitesmercantile 🎄How is it Thanksgiving Eve? What is happening with time. I don’t understand. We are waking up in a Chattanooga hotel hitting the road again for holiday travel! Hope this day shrouds you with calm and kindness, I’m sending an extra prayer up for the nervous system of ALL parents in cars with their children today, may we arrive safely and sanely to our destinations!!! May our precious children forgive us for any grown-up absolute meltdowns we might possibly endure, after we ask for it of course ❤️❤️ Some days we are all losing it together 🤣 Waking up to 4 lively healthy incredible crazy-making adorable littles today, no hospitals to navigate like one of our friends battling @stjude, just the grocery aisle. No empty chairs at our family table tomorrow like our friends in Nashville after the school tragedy. While parents and children are reeling from unspeakable things in the Middle East, my table of children is full today. While my niece and nephew will be missing their mama tomorrow, mine have me next to them. Hold on tight to what you have, this very morning. Squeeze your babies and loved ones who are here and speak words of encouragement and life and love into them today, because these are our GOLDEN days…
On Saturday I took the big three to @penton_farms, we were blown away by this random discovery from a morning google search! Piles of activities kept us there for 5 hours straight. We didn’t know a soul, walked around in the sunshine, explored every square inch of what they had to offer, and I thanked God every damn minute for a day like we had. No events or pressure or schedule. No sense of time and no rush. Just the 4 of us while Daddy and Georgia got their time at home ❤️ It was languid and essential. It was sunshine and beauty. It was breath back in my almost lifeless lungs. It was a day I will always want again, over and over, one day. Last month my beautiful late sister Katie would have been 31, my absolutely adored and beloved uncle died two weeks ago, my heart has ruptured over the October 7th attack and aftermath, and I’m supposed to still do normal things like each and every one of you (ya know slice oranges, homework, work and intentional life planning). While we are all face-planted over different reasons during different seasons, please keep in mind how absolutely crucial it is to put every single thing on the shelf-and cultivate joy in absolutely whatever capacity you have to make that happen. I love childhood-every zoo visit (a week before the 4 of us did the same thing when baby girl was sick it was precious time), every car sing along with the windows down, it’s ok to cry while singing ghostbusters. Don’t stop living during a barrage of sadness. I’m living for those who can’t anymore-for Katie, for my uncle, for the lives lost in the last 3 weeks, and others I loved. How about you? Who are you living for? Let your kids see you crying, and smiling, and showing them that they can’t stop life when it becomes too heavy, no. Absolutely not an option. That is the VERY time when it should be shining the brightest, in the middle of the river of tears. It’s fine if they fall in the middle of the corn maze…
This is my mother’s mantle. As a human being with a beating heart-I have no words for the horrific kidnappings, rape, torture and savage murders committed by Hamas against innocent Israeli civilians who woke up to pure evil this past Saturday morning. October 7th was the single highest number of deaths in one day since the Holocaust. As a mother, I have no words for the literal millions of children between Palestine and Israel caught in the midst of their absolutely harrowing new realities. The pictures and videos from these areas are more than any of us should ever have to endure. Our hearts were never created to bolster these types of horrors. Hamas has one goal, to annihilate the Jews. They have shown their heartlessness towards their own people they “govern” since they knew exactly what the response would be. Attempts to rationalize, provide “context” around, or justify this massacre is purely indefensible, and anti-Semitic. Please do not cease in praying for these hostages miraculous safe return, for the families torn apart, for the awful humanitarian crisis exploding, for the depraved hearts to turn from their evil, for the children, oh for the children, and for this violent and dangerous hatred to be extinguished, for healing and peace to prevail. Do not be afraid to speak up for this latest genocide, to share stories, lest someone ever be too afraid to speak up for us in the same situation. Share your broken heart if you feel the need, turn off your comments from dangerous inhumane words, and allow a time of sobering reality and grieving. Lord, if we ever needed you, we need you now…
We are wide awake, 3 weeks shy of ONE. Listening to the sights and sounds of life with her other 3 siblings that sometimes pick her up by the leg like she’s a Thanksgiving turkey, but we still have our limbs somehow. She is everything curious and happy. She is healing balm to the physically and emotionally weary (usually me!). She laughed for the first time a few weeks ago and I felt like I might die of joy, I’ve never seen happiness worn like this on a baby. She is changing the world one heart at a time with her smile, that holds more joy inside of it than any other smile I’ve ever seen. Georgie went to the airport a few weeks ago, and was a total rockstar in the lines and crowds everywhere. I asked the Lord to show us who needed to see her giant healing smile and to please intersect us with them. We had to be there at 4am for a flight and watching the exhausted people’s eyes absolutely light up when she looked at them was truly a beautiful sight. She finds pure joy in every human living, and I could tell for some of them it may have been a long time since someone had looked at them like that with such unfailing love and curiosity, and a giggle on the side.
Arlo says “Mommy, Georgia Gwace is the gweatest gift that Jesus ever gave us”, I think he’s spot on…
